when you are fragile

You put down the phone and turn away, laying your forehead against the cool, white wall as if you need to feel a tangible limit to existence, or else any moment you will shatter into a thousand splinters. And maybe - if it's been a long day, and there's nothing nice for dinner, and the person on the other end of the line was considerate but still you had to complain, so maybe, just a little - you weep.

Life can be hard. Sometimes. Isn't that so? Wouldn't you agree? Not for any real reason. It just all dries up, and the earth beneath your tentative feet scratches you, and the sky seems too brittle, far too bright. And you feel fragile.

What a beautiful thing to be.

Fragile - it's a hand held out, open to the first hesitant drops of rain. It's lowering yourself silent to the night, or letting your eyes speak when he says why, really? after you've tried too hard to laugh.

It's allowing.





When you're fragile, love can get in. It doesn't have to hammer away at a brave attitude. It isn't shielded by determination, stubborness, courage, fear. In it can come, quiet and smiling, to take gentle hold of your heart. Within that embrace, you feel your pulse. Maybe it goes too fast. Maybe it hurts, as if every beat is a stabbing, or an old cruel taunt, or a memory played over and again of someone important turning away.

But that pulse, it's what keeps you alive. You have to take it, pain and all. That's why life is hard, sometimes. Even when - especially when - you try to make it easy. If you block that heartbeat up with courage and strength, the teeth-grit of fierceness, it can do nothing except echo, echo, inside of you. Getting louder, sounding worse. Making you feel finally like you are splintered already, and only your will, like a wall, keeps you from exploding.

So breathe, and soften yourself into sorrow, fragility, and let love in. Let him hold your heart until you hear the truth in that wild pulse -

It's a song, made just for you.



shared with roses of inspiration

3 comments:

  1. beautifully expressed
    unbelievably perfect timing for my stance today
    thank you

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  2. Oh sweet friend, as Tammie Lee said, this was so beautifully expressed. Thank you, dear one, for sharing with Roses of Inspiration. Hugs to you!

    ReplyDelete